Chi è l’ultima?

Chi è l’ultima? (Who is last?)Our doctors doesn’t have a receptionist nor does it have any queue system, when you enter the waiting room you shout Chi è l’ultima?

Hopefully someone will reply Io! (me!) this system works providing you are not visiting the doctor for deafness, laryngitis or because you are an Englishman.

So here I am on a cold Monday morning sat in the doctors with 15 other ill people waiting for our doctor who is late as per normal.

This Chi è l’ultima system works perfectly for Italians in doctors surgeries throughout Italy, that is until somebody decides they have something more important to do than sit in the doctors.

Maria ( let’s call her Maria) has just thrown a mini tantrum waved her hands in the air complained that the doctor is still not here and walked out. All very interesting, now we are having a fab discussion as to who was before Maria and who is after who?

I am trying not to giggle, especially as I forgot to ask Chi è l’ultima when I came in and after sitting here for twenty minutes I have forgot who came in after me plus I keep hearing l’inglese..

Forty minutes later the doctor has turned up, on crutches! everybody is suitable impressed, amongst the waiting room of Italians the doctor on his crutches looks sicker than any of us.

Those that were complaining bitterly are now looking at their feet as the doctor drags himself his bag and crutches across the room

And just to put the icing on the cake Maria must have seen the doctor arrive because she has re-entered the waiting room and is trying to negotiate her position back in the queue. I of course helped her by calling io ultima!!!


The doctor said I have to rest my leg, I know my Italian is not very good, but I am sure he said I was not to make any more cups of tea, clean the kitchen or any other house related jobs.. I will need to break this news to Mrs Sensible gently. Because I know she was worried

30 thoughts on “Chi è l’ultima?

  1. Ahhhh…..why is it that whenever I read your posts I get nostalgic….for a system that is proper bonkers but which is also so entertaining!Here in London I experience something completely different….and even with an allocated number the whole experience is never that fun!
    Grazie Peter, because of your words I can finally smile at a country I never really understood not felt as my own but which has definitely some contagious madness!

    Liked by 1 person

    • The madness of Italy suits my weird sense of humour, I am giggling fit to burst here, no one knows who is next and there are several people trying to solve the problem and just to confuse us more sick people are arriving and asking who is last!!

      Liked by 1 person

    • Don’t get too excited…. When I finally got to talk to the doctor to tell him my problems, he decided to tell me how he hurt his legs. I oohh and arrhhhed in all the correct places and shook my head and tutted as he told me what had happened.

      When I returned home to Mrs S I told her the doctor is on crutches, she asked me what happened to him, my reply…. I honestly haven’t a clue.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I had to do a double take when I opened my email this morning and there was something with an Italian title from the Englishman in Italy!
    My mind said “he couldn’t have become fluent that fast”. But I had to wait because every time I tried to read the post it wouldn’t load. Too many Americans shopping on “Cyber Monday” so I’ve only just been able to read the entire post. Yes, I think the doctor needed to rest his leg and you never mentioned that you were there because of a sore leg (or did I miss that part?)
    Many years ago I had hurt my leg and I had a lady doctor who gave me the same advice you “claim” your doctor gave you….my husband said we were in collusion….especially when she said I couldn’t cook anything that required standing.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I had to laugh. We have a similar system in our village clinic here in Turkey. I took my father in law in the other day and, seeing the queue of other sickly people, decided he wasn’t going to wait and walked straight into the doctor’s office, yelled at the poor people in side and sat straight down. Mortified! Luckily I don’t speak enough Turkish to hear what they were no doubt saying about us LMAO!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ha ha – you always make me smile. 🙂 It is a very sensible system actually, if I think about it, and something that would work far better here than the silly booking in system that we have and which can sometimes mean waiting a week or more to see the Dr. I am reminded of a time I went to the Dr with a very painful muscle spasm in my back and she told me that I shouldn’t be doing housework – it was much too dangerous! 😀

    Liked by 2 people

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